- How do you know if you’re happy?
- How do you know if you’ve grown up?
- How do you know that you’ve given all you can give?
My momma used to joke at times saying, “I can’t know that.” I’ve adopted this phrase most recently saying it in conjunction with things I don’t desire to know. For example, I don’t want to know how the magician makes the woman float in the air. For me, knowing would take the mystery and fun out of the show. But, folks like my 11 year old- they want to know.
So, how could he know that? I send him to google of course.
But when it comes to questions such as the ones we started with, questions that beg us to examine ourselves, google is not necessarily the place we go. We have to actually look inside. This is what makes my private coaching with teachers so much fun: the desire to discover things about ourselves. Looking inside at the complex fluid humans we are brings new thoughts, challenges, and promises to every day!
What’s the first step in answering the question “How do you know…?”
Get clear. That’s it. Get a really clear vision about who you are, where you came from, and where you desire to go.
Look at yourself and make a list of “who” you are: mother, daughter, teacher…
Then think about and list where you came from: family gatherings, beaches, mountains, trips, working in the fields…
Then list your desires: travel, family, children,love, grands…
Once you get really clear about who you are, the “how you know” will begin to form itself. You’ll see a measuring stick develop that is based on your values and beliefs. At this point, you may see some beliefs that you’ve held that perhaps you’d like to let go of. Or maybe you see a value you thought was true for you is one you actually borrowed from someone in your past. It is no longer congruent. These can be changed- now that you recognize them. That’s the gift of clarity!
Knowing “who” you are allows you to determine “how” you are. Without the “who” you’ll never know “how.”
Question: “How do you know…?”
Answer: By learning “Who you are.”